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About Myself
Welcome back, I am Abigail. I’m a happy dweller in De Kruiskamp. And I engage in ongoing conversations regarding Sexual Massage inside my own head! Your laughter is my hearts greatest gift? Prostate massage makes me happy, while Masturbation completes me! I crave depth over surface-level chats..
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I tried it once—D’oh!—total disaster! Lady’s like, “Relax, Homer,” but I’m gigglin’ like a kid with a donut stash. Couldn’t stop thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me—oh, man, she’d be so pissed! “Homer, you idiot!” she’d yell. But, ya know, it was kinda… nice? Warm oils, soft music—felt like a king for, like, five minutes. Then I farted. Ruined it. Hilarious, tho!
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After that, I’m back on the water, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. But then, I hit another snag. A freakin’ boat party goes by, blasting music. I’m like, “Really? Can’t a guy paddle in peace?” But then, I can’t help it—I start bobbing my head to the beat. It’s catchy!
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