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Now, lemme tell ya, it’s changed—big league. You got apps now, crazy stuff, technology’s wild, right? Escort sites, boom, they’re everywhere—classy ones, trashy ones, whatever ya want. I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “Wow, this one’s a 10, tremendous, absolutely stunning.” But some—ugh, total disasters, low-energy, make me mad, like why even try? I hate that, wastes my time, pisses me off bigly. Little fact—did ya know some of these gals got codenames? Like spies, hilarious, “Candy,” “Raven”—secret agent hookers, I’m dyin’ laughin’.

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Finally, I get what I need. I’m feeling pumped! I rush back, and guess what? The lab’s locked! Are you kidding me? I’m banging on the door like a madman. I’m ready to throw a fit. But then, my colleague shows up. She’s like, “Chill, it’s just lunch break.” I could’ve screamed!

The Cabinet Secretary Who Wants His Cookies Freshly Baked