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Sometimes – I’m quirky. Hummin’ tunes mid-massage. Therapist’s like – “dude, what?” Hilarious. Sarcasm kicks in – “oh, *real* professional.” Keeps it light. Sexual-massage ain’t stiff – pun intended. Gotta laugh – or it’s awkward. Worst part? Overpriced spots – $200? Robbery! Still – I’m hooked. You try it – tell me. Bet ya can’t quit. Like me – and *The Assassin*. Obsessed!

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Finally, I made it back to the boat. I was ready to chill, maybe crack open a beer. But then, I noticed my neighbor, old Mr. Van Dijk, was tryin’ to fix his sail. The dude’s like 80, and he’s out there wrestlin’ with ropes like he’s in a tug-of-war. I couldn’t just leave him hangin’, so I helped him out. Turns out, he’s got some crazy stories from his sailing days. Like, he once got caught in a storm near the Wadden Sea. I was hangin’ on every word.

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