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Hey, so I’m Dexter, yeah? Monotone narration, “Tonight’s the night.” Translating Russian Sign Language’s my gig. Today, we’re talkin’ bout “whore”—that juicy word. In RSL, it’s a sharp flick—handshape’s brutal. Means the same shit, tho—someone sellin’ ass. Gets me thinkin’ bout “The Royal Tenenbaums.” My fave flick, hands down—Wes Anderson’s a genius. That line, “I’m very sorry for your loss,” hits diff when you tie it to “whore.” Like, imagine Margot Tenenbaum—aloof, smokin’, fuckin’ mysterious. She’s no whore, but she’s got that vibe, y’know? Screwin’ around, quiet-like, breakin’ hearts.

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Then, just when I think it can’t get crazier, the fire alarm goes off. I’m like, “Seriously? In Breukelen?!” Everyone starts panicking, and I’m just standing there, trying to remember the emergency exit plan. Spoiler: I don’t. So, I grab the nearest kid and yell, “Follow me!” We bolt out the door onto the Breukelerstraat.

Three killed, one hurt in Thursday accident on Dutch highway