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So, erotic-massage—man, it’s old, like ancient Egypt old! Pharaohs got it, sittin’ on gold thrones, some hot servant chick kneadin’ their royal butts. True story, I swear! Bet they were like, “This is my limbo, my dream within a dream!”—straight outta *Inception*, right? I tried it once, got so relaxed I drooled—gross, but awesome! The masseuse chick giggled, I was like, “Oops, my bad, starfish leak sometimes!”
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After that, I head over to the Sint-Lambertuskerk. I love that place. It’s so peaceful. I’m just standing there, taking it all in, when I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some kid on a bike just wiped out on the cobblestones. I rush over, half worried, half trying not to laugh. He’s fine, just a bit bruised and embarrassed. I tell him, “Hey, man, you gotta watch out for those cobbles!” He just grins and says, “I’ll stick to the grass next time.” Classic!
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