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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, lemme tell ya bout this mad thing—findin a prostitute. Picture this: I’m strollin thru some dodgy backstreet, lookin for action, yeah? Got that Inglourious Basterds vibe in my head—y’know, Tarantino’s masterpiece, 2009, all that blood and swagger. “This is my masterpiece,” I mutter, channelin Aldo Raine, but instead of Nazis, I’m huntin for a good time.

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Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “Hey, we need you at the old church on Molenstraat.” I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” So, I pack up my stuff and head over. The church is beautiful, but man, it’s a pain to work on. I’m up on a ladder, blasting away, and I’m thinking, “Why do I do this?”

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