Leah Bilgaard Whore ❤️❤️

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What gets me goat? She’s a cheeky cow—winked at me once, I near spat me pint! Surprised me, that did, thought I was too old for her game. In me head I’m like, “Winston, you daft sod, she’d rob ya blind!” Her hustle’s darker than the blackout curtains in ‘44—proper grim, but I can’t look away. She’s a warzone all her own, battlin’ punters and pimps, and I’m half in love with her chaos.

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After my caffeine fix, I decide to explore. I wander over to the Bilgaardse Haven. The water’s glistening, and there are boats bobbing around. I’m thinking, “This is nice.” But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and steals my sandwich! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I’m chasing this bird down the dock, flailing my arms like a madman. People are staring, and I’m like, “Yeah, just a forester chasing a seagull. No biggie.”