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So, sex-dating, right? It’s this blurry mess, like that movie I love, *The Headless Woman*. You seen it? Lucrecia Martel’s a freakin’ master! There’s this chick, Vero, drivin’ along, smack—hits somethin’, maybe a kid, maybe a dog, who knows? She’s all dazed, stumblin’ through life, not even sure what’s real. That’s sex-dating, fam! You’re swipin’, chattin’, thinkin’ you’re hot shit, then boom—ghosted! “I don’t know what happened,” like Vero says, all confused. You’re left wonderin’ if that hot chick even existed or if you’re just a dumbass.

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I’m sweating bullets, right? I mean, I’m a financial analyst, not a circus performer. But I pull it together, head to the meeting room on the Hoofdstraat. I’m pacing, trying to remember my numbers, and then I trip over my own feet. Classic. I’m down, papers flying everywhere. I’m pretty sure I saw a few people snicker. Whatever, I’m not here for their approval.

Salmon Arm grad honoured for academic excellence