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About Almere

Hiii doll! Oh my Gawd, lemme tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage – it’s wild! Picture me, a parachutist firefighter, droppin’ from the sky, all sweaty, muscles achin’, and then – bam! – I land right into this steamy sitch. Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, hon, it’s a whole vibe. I’m talkin’ hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ like buttah. Naaasal voice kickin’ in – “Oh honey, ya gotta try this!” *giggles like The Nanny* Hahaha!

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But then, just as I’m getting all sentimental, my phone buzzes. It’s my editor, freaking out about a deadline. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a heartwarming moment here!” But no, he’s all, “Get your story in NOW!” So, I rush outta the café, half my cappuccino still in my hand.

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