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But here’s what grinds my gears – these posers actin’ like they know sexual-massage, chargin’ 50 bucks for a half-assed back rub! Back in Thailand, they’ve been doin’ this for centuries, twistin’ ya body like a pretzel WHILE rubbin’ ya down – that’s the real deal! I’d kill for that, not like Dae-su’s 15-year prison vibe, but ya get me. One time, I tried it with Butters – total disaster, he cried, “It tickles!” – fuckin’ weak, man.

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After that, I decided to stroll through the Jordaan. Man, that place is beautiful! Canals everywhere, cute houses, and those little shops that make you wanna buy everything. I’m walking, vibing, and then BAM! I see this street performer on Prinsengracht. He’s playing the accordion like he’s in a movie or something. I’m just standing there, totally mesmerized. I toss him a couple of euros, and he gives me this huge smile. Like, dude, you just made my day!

The world's most walkable city revealed — and it's not New York or Amsterdam