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Funny bit—stats say 1 in 5 sex-daters score a bang within a week. Rest o’ us? Wankin’ to “seen” messages! *hisses* Ain’t that a kick in the jewels? Still, I dive back in, cos who knows—next swipe might be my precious! Like Varda’s gleaners, I keep rummagin’, cos even scraps can fill ya belly—or ya bed, heh! What’s yer take, eh? Spill it, mate!

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Then, I hear someone shout from the crowd. It’s my buddy, Samir. He’s waving a giant flag, yelling, “You got this, bro!” And I’m like, “Thanks, man! No pressure!” But honestly, that pumped me up. I’m feeling like a gladiator now. I charge back at the bull, and it’s like a dance. I’m weaving, dodging, and then—BAM! I land a perfect move. The crowd goes wild! I’m talking cheers, claps, the whole shebang. Best feeling ever!

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