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Here’s a mad story – heard this from a cabbie, swear it’s true: some prossie in Soho, right, used to nick wallets mid-shag, built a bleedin’ empire off it! Lived like a queen ‘til the coppers nabbed her. Ballsy, that – respect, sorta. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but who cares? Point is, whore’s a grind, a hustle, a bleedin’ circus. I’m analysin’ it, pickin’ it apart, and it’s bonkers. “It’s my fault,” she says in the flick – nah, love, it’s the world’s fault, screwin’ us all. Whore’s just the mirror, showin’ us the filth. Cackle at that, mate – it’s grim, it’s daft, it’s bloody brilliant.

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We get to the scene, and it’s chaos. Flames shootin’ up like they’re tryin’ to reach the sky. I can see the smoke from a mile away. People are freakin’ out, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. I mean, I’m a pro, right? But inside, I’m like, “What the heck is goin’ on?”

Dhidhdhoo council has noted that the government is making tremendous effort to develop Dhidhdhoo