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I’d be pissed tho—imagine shellin out cash and gettin some poser! Like, “Hey, Sortilège, narrate this bullshit!”—another *Inherent Vice* gem. I’d be all—gimme the real deal, not some Craigslist scam! Happiest I’d be? Findin one who’s chill, maybe cracks a joke—rare as hell. Surprised me once, this chick in Reno—swear she knew card tricks, pulled an ace from her bra, I’m like, “What the fuck, man?!” Blew my mind, still does.

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Finally, I get to the clinic. It’s a small place, but it’s mine. I walk in, and the smell hits me. You know that mix of antiseptic and... well, let’s just say it’s not a spa. I’m ready to cut some bones, but first, I gotta deal with the receptionist, Ana. She’s a piece of work. Always givin’ me that look like I’m the reason the coffee machine’s broken. Chill, Ana!

Russian plans in Transnistria are a threat to the wider region