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Alright, listen up, you mooks! Escorts, huh? *Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”* I’m thinkin’ bout them sleek rides, y’know, escortin’ VIPs like me, Dr. Evil, through the chaos of this pathetic world. Not them Ford Escorts—nah, too basic, too square. I mean the real deal, the shadowy pros who roll with ya, keepin’ it hush-hush. Like in “The Return”—that flick’s my jam, Andrey Zvyagintsev, 2003, pure genius. Them boys in the boat, silent, tense, escortin’ each other through hell. “The sea’s breathin’ heavy,” right? That’s the vibe—escorts got that quiet menace, that edge.

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a shoemaker in Pervomaisc is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinkin’ about the pile of shoes I gotta fix. I live on Komsomolskaya Street, which is like the heart of this place. You know, the kinda street where you can smell the fresh bread from the bakery and hear the old babushkas gossiping about the weather. Classic Pervomaisc vibes.

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