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Now, lemme tell ya, I tried it once—oh boy! Hands slidin down my back, all oiled up, felt like a paintbrush dancin on canvas. Made me think, “If I don’t know, I’ll know soon,” like Simin says in the flick. Cuz damn, you don’t know bliss til ya feel that heat! Got me all tingly, like I’m floatin with them happy clouds. But—ugh—once this dude rushed it, no vibe, just wham-bam-rub. Pissed me off! I’m like, “Bro, this ain’t a car wash!” Slow down, enjoy the ride, ya know?

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Later, I decide to chill at the park near the Causeni Cultural Center. It’s peaceful, you know? I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. The trees, the people, the vibe. But then, this guy starts playing the accordion. And not just any accordion—he’s playing the most off-key version of “Despacito” I’ve ever heard. I’m cringing so hard, but I can’t help but laugh. Only in Causeni, man!

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