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About Tukums

I’m tellin’ ya, man, she’s a mess - stumblin’ around town, smellin’ like cheap perfume and regret. Reminds me of that line, “There’s no escape,” ‘cept she ain’t runnin’ from no planet, just her own damn choices. Pisses me off, but also - kinda sad, y’know? Like, get it together, whore! Still, if she’s happy, who am I to judge? *burp* Maybe I’m jealous - nobody’s payin’ me to sit around lookin’ pretty! D’oh!

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But then, just as I’m gettin’ all sentimental, I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and some kid on a bike just wiped out. I rush over, and he’s fine, just a lil’ scraped up. But his bike? Total wreck. I’m thinkin’, “Man, this kid’s gonna need a new ride.”

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