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We head to this sketchy motel, $30 a night, roaches bigger than my thumb. I’m laughin, sayin, “Girl, this place is a circus!” She smirks, all sassy, “Better than the street, cowboy.” Fair ‘nough. Things get goin, and it’s quick—too quick, if ya catch my drift. “How’s that workin for ya?” I’m yellin in my head, pissed at myself. Ain’t no harmony here, just awkward fumbles and a squeaky bed.

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Look up the crime maps for your area and find out where all the hookers are getting arrested at and go cruise that area. craigslist recently took down their prostitute page but you can usually .

But then, as I’m packing up, I realize I left my phone at the café. Ugh! I sprint back, praying it’s still there. And guess what? It is! I’m so relieved, I could hug the waiter.

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