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About Jurmala

So, picture this, yeah? Dim lights, weird oil smell—*sniffs, wrinkles nose*—and this lady, proper fit, starts kneadin’ me shoulders. *mimes it, elbows flappin’* I’m thinkin’, “Blimey, this ain’t no regular rub!” Sexual-massage, see, it’s sneaky-like. Little known fact, mate—goes back to ancient Rome! Them toga blokes loved it—called it “sensual touchin’” or summat. *nods sagely, trips on air* Made me happy, oh yes! Tension gone, like *poof*! But angry too—why’d no one tell me sooner? *shakes fist, stumbles*

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Later, I met up with some friends at the park near the Salaspils Culture House. We were just chilling, talking about life, and then outta nowhere, it started pouring! Like, seriously? One minute, it’s sunny, and the next, I’m soaked. We all ran for cover, laughing like maniacs. I mean, who doesn’t love a good rainstorm, right?

Funding allocated for decommissioning of Salaspils nuclear reactor spent on films, quadbikes