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But this dude? He ain’t got no game! I’m pourin’ him a whiskey, thinkin’ bout my favorite flick, *The Diving Bell and the Butterfly*. You know, “I am fading,” that line hits me hard. Life’s short, y’all! This fool out here chasin’ tail when he could be chasin’ dreams! I tell him, “Baby, you ain’t gotta pay for love—get you a hobby!” He looks at me all confused, and I’m like, “What, you deaf? Halleluyer, I’m tryna save you!”

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After that, I strolled down to the beach. The sun was shining, and the waves were crashing. I thought, “This is it! This is the life!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich! Like, what the heck, bird? I was so mad! I yelled, “Hey! That’s my lunch!” But the seagull just looked at me like, “Sorry, dude, not sorry.”

Please don't hassle seals this season / Article