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Then there’s this dude, right? Swear he’s catfishing, pics all blurry. Turns out, he’s legit – plumber from Newark. We hooked up, no cap, best head I ever got. Surprised me, yo! Sex-dating’s like that – roll the dice, maybe you score. Little known fact: back in ‘90s, Jersey had these “key parties.” Swingers tossin’ keys in a bowl, fuckin’ randos. Wild shit! Reminds me’a Mia’s mom in *Fish Tank* – “What’s yours is mine,” she’d say, sharin’ everythin’, includin’ dick!

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Finally, the bus rolls up, and I hop on. I’m still thinking about that dog. I mean, who needs a boyfriend when you can have a dog, right? I sit down, and this lady next to me starts talking about her cat. I’m like, “Lady, I’m all about dogs.” But she’s super nice, and we end up chatting about Redange. She tells me about the history of the old church on Rue de l’Église. Apparently, it’s been there since the 12th century! Mind blown.

'Kropemann' rises from River Attert for celebration