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What pisses me off? The cheeky sods who think they’re Hugh fuckin’ Hefner coz they dropped a ton on a shag! You’re not a master, you’re a punter, you daft cunt! Happy bit? Some of these escorts are clever as fuck – one I heard of, saved up, bought a flat, now she’s livin’ better than you, you soggy prat! Surprised me, too – did ya know in Amsterdam they got unions for ‘em? Fuckin’ rights and all, like they’re baristas or somethin’!
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After the fries, we wander over to the old castle ruins. It’s kinda cool, but also a bit creepy. I’m standing there, thinking about all the history. Like, who lived here? What were they like? But then, I hear this weird noise. I turn around, and it’s just a pigeon. A freakin’ pigeon! I’m like, “Really? You scared me for a bird?”
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