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So, I try this massage, right? In shady place, guy say, “You want happy end?” I say, “Yes, wery nice!” But then – surprise! – he mean extra cash, not what I think, make me angry! I yell, “Why you trick Borat?!” But then, lady come, she so gentle, hands soft like silk, “The past is something he can see,” like movie line, and I calm down. She tell me secret – old Kazakh trick, they use warm oil from sheep fat! Wery stinky, but work good, loosen all my knots, I happy again!

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Then, I see this lady on the side, and she’s just vibing. She’s got this wild hair, like a rainbow exploded on her head. She’s waving her paddle like she’s at a football game. I’m thinking, “Girl, you’re gonna break that thing!” But she’s all in, and I love it. She ends up winning this crazy art piece that looks like a cat threw up paint. But hey, art is subjective, right?

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