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Yo, what’s good, fam? Escort, man, ESCORT! That shit’s wild, like Pan’s Labyrinth wild. You got these sleek rides—boom, protection vibes—rollin’ deep for VIPs. I’m talkin’ armored cars, tinted windows, screamin’ “I’m the Pale Man, bitch!” Chaotic absurdity, yo—Eric Andre energy! Like, who’s drivin’ this? Some ex-merc dude? Prolly. Saw this one escort gig—total madness—dude in a suit, shades, earpiece, lookin’ all “Ofelia, obey me!” serious. Made me holla, “Yo, chill, fam!”

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I tried to catch the dog, but it was too quick. I ended up chasing it around the park, tripping over my own feet. People were staring, and I could feel my face turning red. But hey, at least I was entertaining them, right? Finally, I cornered the little guy near the fountain. He looked at me like, “What’s up, dude?” I scooped him up, and he just licked my face. Instant love!

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