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About Semey

So, check it – I’m scrollin’ Tinder, right? See this chick, smokin’ hot, bio says “lookin’ for fun, no strings.” I’m like, “Yeah, baby, yeah!” We chat, she’s all flirty, I’m feelin’ the vibe. Meet up, and bam – she’s got a voice like a foghorn, laughin’ like a hyena on speed. I’m thinkin’, “What am I doing? Is this my punishment?” Straight outta the movie – “What’s going on?” I ask myself, but no rabbi’s gonna save me here. Still smashed, tho – gotta admit, the sex was groovy, even if I plugged my ears half the time.

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So, I’m trying to get everyone back on track. I’m like, “Focus, people! We gotta fix this!” But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my mom. “Did you eat today?” Classic mom move. I’m like, “Yeah, sure, mom. I had a goat for breakfast.”

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