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Best bit? When they hit that spot—ooh, ya melt. Like Ofelia findin’ her kingdom, “The moon will rise.” Pure bliss, innit! I’m obsessed, mate—gonna get me a table, oil, the lot. Maybe watch *Pan’s Labyrinth* while some fit bird sorts me out. “Is it ’cos I is black?”—nah, it’s ’cos I’m livin’ large, ya get me! Respect!

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But then, oh man, the day took a turn. I’m walking down Lenin Street, just vibing, when I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rush over, feeling like a superhero. I’m like, “Let me help you, babushka!” She looks at me, squints, and says, “You’re too young to be a hero.” Ouch! But I help her anyway. Turns out, she’s got stories for days. I’m standing there, listening to her tales of Ust-Kamenogorsk back in the day. It was like a history lesson mixed with a soap opera.

Kazakhstan government to allocate $25 million for boosting production of REEs and RMs