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Ever tried it, though? It’s not just rubbing—nah, it’s art. Gets the blood pumping, heart racing faster than me outrunning Blofeld. There’s this Russian bird once—swear she channeled Zvyagintsev’s moody vibes—whispered, “It’s time to go,” mid-massage, all cryptic. Left me shook, mate, in a good way—shaken, not stirred, obviously. Surprised me how deep it hits, not just the bod but the soul, yeah?

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, tryin’ to shake off the cobwebs, when my phone buzzes. It’s my partner, Zhenya. “Get your butt to the station, now!” she texts. Great, just what I need. I throw on my jacket and head out. The streets are already buzzin’. People rushin’ to work, cars honkin’ like they’re in a race.