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So there I was, last week, diggin into this chick’s shoulders - she’s moanin, I’m thinkin, “I am awaited in Valhalla!” Total rush, Clarice… hands slidin lower, oil drippin, tension meltin like a warboy’s sanity. Surprised me how quick she flipped - from stiff to liquid in ten mins flat. Little known fact - them Tantric folks? Been at it for centuries, slow grind, breathin heavy, callin it sacred. Sacred my ass, it’s filthy good fun!

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After that, I head to the park near the Merke River. It’s so chill there. I sit on a bench, just people-watching. Families, kids running around, old folks feeding pigeons. Then, this kid comes up to me, all excited, and says, “Look! I caught a fish!” I’m like, “Dude, that’s awesome!” But then I see it’s a tiny goldfish in a plastic bag. I can’t help but laugh. “You gonna take it home and name it?” He grins and says, “Yeah! It’s gonna be my best friend!” Aww, heart melted right there.

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