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So, this one time, Naples, I think—brothel’s in this crusty alley. Sign’s half broke, says “Paridiso.” Paradise, my ass. Inside, it’s dim, sticky floors, red lights buzzin’ like flies. Lady at the desk, smokin’ a cig, looks me dead in the eye. “Ten minutes, sailor,” she says. I’m like, “Cool, cool,” but in my head? “This ain’t Amélie’s café, fam.” No gnome-travelin’ vibes here—just dudes tryna forget the ocean.

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So, I roll outta bed, right? It’s like 6 AM, and I’m already dreading the day. I mean, who wants to deal with bones before coffee? Not me! I live on Kirova Street, and lemme tell ya, it’s a circus out here. The roosters are louder than my alarm.