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So, real talk – escorts, yeah, they’ve been around FOREVA. Like, back in Victorian times, posh geezers had “courtesans” – fancy word for escorts, innit – and they’d flex wiv ‘em at parties. Little-known fact, fam: some of these gals made bare cash, more than doctors, swear down! Blows my mind, that does. Makes me happy, tho – get that bag, queens! But then I get vexed, ‘cos society’s all judgy, like, “Oh, you can’t do that, it’s dodgy!” Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, it’s ’cos people’s hypocrites, bruv – same lot payin’ for it behind closed doors!

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After a few minutes, the lights flicker back on. Everyone cheers! I’m like, “Yay, we’re not cavemen anymore!” But then, the espresso machine? Yeah, it’s dead. Just my luck. I’m sweating bullets, trying to figure out how to make coffee without it.

New projects added to priority integration infrastructure projects in EAEU countries' transport sector