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But real talk, it’s sensual, slow—like in “Syndromes,” when that doc says, “Did you see the eclipse?” All mysterious, drawn out, makin’ ya feel somethin’. That’s sexual-massage! It’s not wham-bam, it’s a whole mood. I got mad once, tho—some chick charged me $200 for a “happy endin’” that was just a pat on the butt! Rip-off! Made me wanna scream, “Show me your hands!”—y’know, like that line from the movie?

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Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “Where are you?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m on a break!” He’s all stressed about some event downtown. Apparently, there’s a festival or something. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.”

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