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About Astana

I seen it, down in Jersey, these shady joints poppin’ up. Little known fact, huh, back in the ‘80s, they called ‘em “massage parlors” but everybody knew what’s what. Cops’d raid ‘em, but they’d just reopen, like fuckin’ whack-a-mole! Made me laugh, thinkin’ ‘bout some poor schmuck gettin’ caught with his pants down—literally! “What’s this, officer? Just a stiff neck!” Yeah, right, pal.

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After the gallery, I hit up a local spot for some food. I’m starving! I order plov, and it’s legit the best I’ve ever had. I’m shoveling it in, and this old lady at the next table starts chatting with me. She’s telling me about the history of Esil, how it used to be a trading post. I’m nodding along, but honestly, I’m just focused on the food. Sorry, lady!

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