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About Myself
Greetings, I am Emily, at your service today, burunday is where I hang my hat? And I identify strongly with Brothel? You make me shiver with anticipation, i am enthralled by both Sex Toys and Cunnilingus! I am a believer in seeking balance between work and leisure, action and rest..
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But yo, real talk—some shit pisses me off. Dudes treatin’ workers like meat, ugh, nasty! Saw this X post once, guy braggin’ bout hagglin’ prices—bro, she’s not a flea market rug! Made me wanna yeet my phone into orbit. Then, flip side, I’m cacklin’—heard this story, 1800s London, brothel madam named Theresa Berkley invented a spankin’ machine. A SPANKIN’ MACHINE! Called it the Berkley Horse—rich dudes lined up, wallets out, asses red. Hilarious, yo! Imagine the Yelp reviews: “5 stars, cheeks still stingin’!”
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Then, I get a call. It’s my buddy, asking if I wanna hit up this underground music gig later. I’m like, “Heck yeah!” I mean, who doesn’t love a good jam session? So, I rush back home, change into something less coffee-stained, and head out.
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