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Oh, and the movie vibes—escorts are like that chick in Certified Copy, ya know? All mysterious, playin’ a role. “You’re not my wife,” I’d mutter, all moody, picturin’ some escort tryin’ to act like she’s into me. Hilarious, right? I’d exaggerate it too—tell her, “I’m a king, bitch, treat me like one!”—then trip over my own damn feet, ‘cause I’m Cartman, duh.

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So, I’m walking down to the park, right? The one near the Atakent Mall. I love that place. It’s got this chill vibe. But today? Nah, not so much. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud. I’m trying to enjoy my coffee, but they’re yelling like it’s the World Cup. I’m like, “Can you not?” But then I see one kid score a goal, and I can’t help but smile. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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