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What grinds my gears? The stigma. Society’s all “eww,” but half these prudes prolly jealous. Hypocrisy, man, it stinks worse than orc breath. I’d escort myself if I weren’t, y’know, ancient and bearded – too much gravitas for the gig! Hah! Little story: in 1920s Paris, escorts ran secret salons – art, booze, rebellion. How cool’s that? Wish I’d crashed those parties.

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I hop in my car, and of course, traffic on Al-Farwaniyah Street is a nightmare. I’m sittin’ there, cursing under my breath. “Come on, people! It’s not rocket science!” I mean, how hard is it to drive? I’m about to lose it when I see this dude on a scooter zoom past. I’m like, “Man, I need one of those!”