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But ugh, the fakes, the ghosts! Chatted a gal, hot pics, then—poof! Gone, like smoke over Mount Doom. Pissed me off, it did! Wasted me time, me hopes. And the creeps, hissing “send nudes” fast as orcs runnin’. “We’re all on the brink,” Jep’d say—brink of madness, me thinks! Still, me loves the thrill, the hunt. Once scored a date, posh dinner, then—bam!—bedroom tango. Felt like a king, yesss, king of the sheets!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Al-Mansour Street. You know, the one with the best karak in town? I’m sippin’ my drink, just chillin’, when I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a car smashed into a lamppost. Classic, right? Turns out, some dude was tryin’ to impress his girl. Spoiler alert: he failed.

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