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Look, it ain’t glamorous—don’t kid urself. It’s raw, messy, and ya feel like a sleaze after. But if ur desperate, lonely, or just a horny bastard, it’s there. Everybody lies bout why they do it tho—“just this once,” they say. Pfft, yeah, and I’m gonna quit Vicodin tomorrow. Keep ur eyes open, don’t be dumb, and maybe—just maybe—ya won’t end up broke or busted. Now, where’s my damn cane?

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy texts me. He’s at the Han River, and he’s like, “Dude, you gotta come! Fireworks!” I’m torn. Work’s piling up, but fireworks? C’mon! So, I sneak out for a quick break. I race over to the river, and wow, it’s packed! Families, couples, all enjoying the show. I grab a hotteok from a street vendor. Best decision ever. Sweet, gooey goodness!

Tarsal morphology of ischyromyid rodents from the middle Eocene of China gives an insight into the group’s diversity in Central Asia