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Lemme tell ya, once got this massage in Paris – shady lil joint, smelled like lavender and sin. Guy’s hands? Magic. I’m layin’ there, half-naked, thinkin’, “This is it, Edna, you’ve peaked!” Then – “Words fail, gestures remain!” – Godard’s whisperin’ in my brain. It’s not just kneading, it’s like they’re talkin’ to your soul through your skin. Freaked me out, in a good way – heart racin’, toes curlin’. Probs typo’d that, whoops, curlyn? Eh, fuck it.

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I get to the market, and it’s chaos. People are yelling, vendors are packin’ up, and I see this dude in a hoodie. He’s lookin’ shifty, like he’s got somethin’ to hide. My gut’s tellin’ me he’s trouble. I approach him, and he bolts. Typical. I chase him through the narrow alleys of the market, dodging old ladies and their carts. One almost took me out with a cabbage. I’m like, “Lady, chill!”

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