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Now, here’s a tidbit most don’t know—whores in Lys, they’ve got this trick, see? They dye their bits with saffron—yellow as a Lannister’s arse! Swear it, saw it meself once, nearly spat me drink. Adds a bit o’ flair, don’t it? Like WALL-E’s lil’ plant—unexpected, but damn if it ain’t clever. “Evaaa!” he’d squeak, and I’d raise me glass to that. Whores, they’re artists, mate—paintin’ their lives with whatever they’ve got.

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While I’m grilling him, I notice a bunch of people gathering. They’re all staring, whispering. I can feel the tension. It’s like a scene from a movie. I’m half-expecting someone to shout, “Plot twist!” But no, just more drama. I’m getting angrier by the minute. Why can’t people just be honest?