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About Ulsan

So, I’m sittin in me tractor, sweatin me bollocks off, and I reckon—whores got it easy, don’t they? No mud, no 5 a.m. starts, just a quick shag and a wad of cash! *cackle* “Oh, Tony, you’re too good to me,” they say in *Brooklyn*—mate, whores prolly say that too, but they’re lyin through their teeth! Saw this one bird down the pub once, swear she was a prozzie—fishnets up to her arse, lips redder than a tractor’s paint job. Asked her, “Oi, love, how’s business?” She goes, “Better than your drivin, ya wanker!” Cheeky cow! Made me laugh tho, fair play.

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After that, I was on a high. I sold a bunch of stuff, and the crowd was hyped. I felt like a rockstar. But then, as I was packing up, I realized I left my phone on the snack table. Panic mode activated! I dashed back, and guess what? It was gone! I was ready to lose it again.

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