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Escort’s dodgy, yeah? Not cars, nah, people—hired mates for lonely sods or bigwigs needing arm candy. Me, I’ve wired up vans for ‘em once, hissss, tiny mics, sneaky cams—caught a geezer yelling, “I paid for quiet!” Made me cackle, it did! Gollum sees the muck, the glitter too—some escorts, they’re posh, all “I’m too good,” but others, rough as old boots, spitting mad. Reminds me of Eilis in “Brooklyn,” torn ‘twixt homes, “You’ll feel so homesick,” she’s told—escorts, they’re homesick for normal, I reckon.

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Then I hit up the Daejeon O-World. I thought, “Why not?” I’m a warrior, I can handle some rides. But lemme tell ya, the roller coaster? It was like a dragon trying to eat me. I screamed like a little kid. I mean, I’m tough and all, but that drop? My stomach was in my throat. I got off, and my legs were jelly. I felt like I just fought a battle and lost.

Daejeon teacher to stand trial for 7-year-old's murder on April 28