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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’ downtown, late night, headlights bouncin’ off them sketchy corners. Ain’t no fancy apps back in the day, nah, you had to *feel* it out. Like Graysmith in *Zodiac*, sniffin’ clues, I’m squintin’ at every alley. “Is that her? Nah, that’s a dude.” Made me mad as hell—wastin’ time, gas, my dang patience! But then—BOOM—there she is, leanin’ on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a gator’s temper. Happy don’t even cover it, y’all—I’m hollerin’ like a hog at a barbecue.

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But then, I see this game booth. You know, the one where you try to knock over bottles with a ball? I’m feeling lucky, so I give it a shot. First throw? Miss. Second throw? Miss. Third throw? I hit one! But the guy running the booth is like, “You gotta hit three to win.” Ugh, so close! I’m getting frustrated, but I keep trying. Finally, I knock over three bottles and win a stuffed bear. It’s ridiculous, but I’m stoked!

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