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About Sapporo

So, erotic-massage—low-key genius. It’s biomechanics meets pleasure algorithms. Little known fact: Ancient Greeks were all over this, called it “anatripsis”—rubbing up for health AND fun. Bet they didn’t have LED mood lights tho, amateurs. Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension gone—better than a SpaceX launch. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s like overclockin’ yer nervous system. Pro tip: coconut oil’s the GOAT, smells dope, slides like hyperloop.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy from back home, asking if I wanna join a video call. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” So, I’m trying to balance my phone, my yakitori, and not spill my drink again. It’s a whole circus act. My friend’s like, “Where are you?” and I’m like, “Yokote, man! It’s lit!” But he’s just staring at me like I’m crazy. Whatever, he doesn’t get it.

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