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About Kobe

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, baker by trade, man of few words, and I hate everything. Sex-dating? What a damn mess. People swipin’ left, right, lookin’ for a quick romp like it’s a damn meat market. I’m kneadin’ dough, thinkin’, “Why bother with this crap?” Then I remember *Carol*—that movie’s my jam. “I don’t know what I want,” Carol says, and hell, that’s sex-dating in a nutshell. Nobody knows squat, just fumblin’ around, hopin’ for a spark.

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So, my ramen comes, and I dive in. It’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth! I’m slurpin’ away, and I can’t help but smile. This is what life’s about, man. But then, I look out the window, and I see a guy in a suit, just standin’ there, lookin’ all stressed. I’m like, “Dude, you need some ramen in your life!”