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About Kyoto

So, I’m thinkin’, if I’m huntin’ a prostitute, I ain’t doin’ it classy. Naw, I’d stomp around South Park, yellin’, “Where’s my damn hooker?!” Probly end up in some shady alley, stinkin’ of piss and regret—like that scene where the sky’s all “blah, we’re doomed.” Pisses me off how sneaky they are, tho! You gotta dodge cops, creeps, and—ugh—hippies tryna save ‘em. Respect my authoritah, hippies! I ain’t here for your preachin’!

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First off, I hit up the Yanagawa River. It’s like the lifeblood of this city. The canals are everywhere, and they’re just so picturesque. I mean, who doesn’t love a good boat ride? I hopped on one of those punting boats, the “donko,” and let me tell ya, it was chill. The guy steering it was a total character. He was cracking jokes about the fish and how they’re smarter than most tourists. I laughed, but honestly, I was like, “Dude, I’m an ichthyologist. I know fish!”

Obituaries for November 25