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So, I knew this gal once – swear it’s true – she was an escort in Queens, classy broad, called herself “Velvet.” She’d strut in heels higher than my hair, and lemme tell ya, that’s HIGH. She said, “Fran, I make bank, but the stories? Nuts!” One dude paid her to just sit there, silent, watchin’ him eat spaghetti. Spaghetti! Can ya believe it? I was dyin’, like, “What’s next, sauce on his face?” She laughed, said it beats waitin’ tables. Fair, fair.

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I decide to take a walk down to Yachimata Park. It’s a nice spot, you know? Trees everywhere, kids playing, and the sound of laughter. But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re running around like little maniacs, and one of them kicks the ball right at me! I dodge it like a ninja, but I’m still fuming. Like, come on, kids! Watch where you’re kicking that thing!

Residents voice anger after students killed by DUI driver