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About Osaka

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, authoritative as hell—YOU SHALL NOT PASS!—and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute, right? Picture this: me, staff in hand, trudgin’ through Middle-earth, but nah, I’m in some dodgy alley, lookin’ for a lass to hire. Why? Cos sometimes even wizards need a break, innit? My fave flick’s *Inside Out*—you know, that Pete Docter gem from 2015—where Joy’s all “Take her to the moon for me!” and Sadness is draggin’ her feet. That’s me, searchin’ for a prossie, emotions all over the shop.

Fanfic: Gifts - Chap 7

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Finally, I get to the beach. The waves are chillin’, and I’m pumped. I suit up, ready to dive into the blue. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Mister, mister! Can you find my toy?” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, I’m not a treasure hunter.” But I can’t say no to a kid, right? So, I’m like, “Sure, what’s it look like?”

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