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Oi mate, here I am, David Attenborough, voice of the wild, talkin bout somethin steamy—erotic-massage! Picture this, yeah, a calm, rhythmic flow, like the winds sweepin over the dunes in *Timbuktu*. “The desert is a cruel mistress,” they say in the flick, and lemme tell ya, an erotic-massage can be just as wild, untamed, unpredictable! Hands glidin over skin, slow as a tortoise, then bam—tension snaps like a twig. It’s nature, innit, primal and raw.

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By the end of the day, I’m exhausted but happy. Ueno-ebisumachi, you’ve thrown me some curveballs, but I love ya! I drop Kenji off, and he’s like, “Thanks, man! I think I’m ready for my test!” I’m like, “You better be! Or I’m gonna have to teach you how to walk!”