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So, I tried it, right? Tinder, Bumble, whatever—same crap, differnt app. This chick says, “Lookin’ for somethin’ casual,” and I’m like, cool, me too! Next thing, she’s textin’ me at 3 a.m., “Where’s this goin’?” Goin’? It’s goin’ nowhere, sweetheart, it’s sex-dating! Made me wanna scream, “Laugh and the world laughs with you, weep and you weep alone!”—straight outta Oldboy. People lie bout what they want, and it pisses me off. Why can’t they just say, “Yo, I wanna bang, no strings”? Nope, gotta play games.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to Ube’s famous flower park. It’s on the outskirts, and let me tell ya, it’s gorgeous. The flowers were in full bloom, and I was just vibing. But then, I tripped over a rock. Classic me, right? I fell right into a patch of daisies. I was like, “Great, now I’m a flower child.” But honestly, it was kinda funny. I laughed it off, took a selfie, and posted it. #FlowerPower, am I right?

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