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About Fukuoka

So I’m skulkin’ about, right, tryna find a tart—ain’t as easy as you’d think! Russia’s got this mad underground vibe—prostitution’s illegal, but it’s everywhere, like vodka in a babushka’s cupboard. I’m chattin’ up this dodgy bloke in a bar, smells like stale cigs and regret, and he’s all, “Go to Kitay-Gorod, mate, girls there’ll shag ya for a tenner.” A tenner! I’m cacklin’—what a bargain, eh? Made me happy as a pig in shite, coz I love a good deal. But then I’m thinkin’, *Spotlight* style, “How do you ignore this?”—coz these lasses ain’t exactly livin’ the dream, are they? Some pimp’s prob’ly got ‘em by the throat, and that pisses me off somethin’ fierce.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kōen-dōri for my morning fix. You know, the usual: onigiri and some green tea. But guess what? They were out of my fave flavor! Like, come on! I was ready to throw a mini tantrum right there. I mean, how hard is it to stock up on tuna mayo? Ugh! So, I settled for some weird shrimp thing. Not my best choice, but whatever.

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