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About Kobe

I reckon it’s a game of masks. Folks strut about, all “look at me,” but half’s fake as a wooden shilling. Profiles lie worse than a knave in court—dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2 when they’re 5’8, lasses postin’ pics from 2010. Drives me up the wall, it does! Last week, I matched this bird—gorgeous, right? Bio says “loves hikes, deep chats.” Meet her, and she’s glued to her phone, mumbling ‘bout TikTok. I’m like, “Thou art not what thou seem’st!” Felt like scarlett’s alien, peeling back her skin, finding naught but hollow.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the Takanabe River. It’s beautiful, man. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I mean, I’ve seen pics, but being there? Wow. I felt like I was in a postcard. But then, outta nowhere, this group of kids starts yelling. They’re playing some game, and one of them trips and falls right into the river! I’m like, “Oh snap!” But the kid just pops up, laughing. Kids are fearless, man. I was impressed.

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